


Vocal Abuse

by Erisabesu (ErisabesuFic)



Category: Naruto
Genre: Humor, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-07
Updated: 2020-02-07
Packaged: 2021-02-19 05:36:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 872
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22605952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErisabesuFic/pseuds/Erisabesu
Summary: “Come on, Neji!” Naruto digs his heels into the cobble stones and throws both arms around Neji’s neck. “Sing with me!”  [2009.04.15]
Relationships: Hyuuga Neji/Uzumaki Naruto
Comments: 13
Kudos: 50





	Vocal Abuse

**“Vocal Abuse”**

♦

This isn’t like Naruto at all, staggering along the sidewalk and singing something nonsensical at the top of his lungs, too drunk to make it home without Neji’s assistance.

What _is_ like Naruto, is having too many friends in one place, all wanting to buy him a drink in return for some random favor he’d done in the past. Neji is certain that Naruto never intended to collect anything in return; he isn’t the type to keep track. And he knows Naruto can’t very well ignore the drinks pressed into his hand.

However.

If Naruto doesn’t stop that god-awful singing _this minute_ , his next destination will be six feet under ground.

“They see me rollinnnnn’~!” Naruto slurrs, lurching sideways enough that Neji’s arm bumps into the building next to them. “Tryin’ t’ catch me ridin’–”

“OKAY.” Neji shakes him, getting them back on track. “It’s time to quiet down now, Naruto!”

Naruto laughs and squeezes him, then starts right back up again with his voice bellowing into the night.

Neji shuffles them along as quickly as possible, doing his best to ignore that Naruto can neither carry a tune nor get the lyrics right until Naruto begins to improvise some dance moves to go with the song–hip thrusts and neck jerks that really don’t do his body a bit of justice or get them home any quicker.

“Come on, Neji!” Naruto digs his heels into the cobble stones and throws both arms around Neji’s neck. “Sing with me!”

“What? NO. Absolutely not.” Neji tries to push him away and keep them going.

“My music so louuuuud~! I’m swanginnnnnnn~!”

“Just shut up, will you?!” Neji’s eardrums can’t take much more of this.

Naruto hip-thrusts into his leg. “Wanna do some ridin’ dirtayyyy~! Wanna do some ridin’ dirtayy–”

“Quit it!” Neji pushes harder and Naruto just backs him up into the wall, still singing an incoherent jumble of words and notes that are anything but actual music as far as he can tell. When Neji hears something suspiciously like _“Just tryin’ to bone ain’t tryin’ to have no babies”_ –he snaps.

Neji grabs Naruto by the arm and drags him between one building and the next, and then behind a dumpster that will conceal them well enough.

“You will shut up, _now_ ,” he admonishes, then he undoes his fly and guides Naruto down to his knees.

There are no objections. Naruto is eager, and Neji takes a deep breath, Naruto’s mouth now completely focused on him instead of waking up the street with his embarrassing donkey-braying. In fact, Naruto warms up to the task quite well, putting in lots of effort to get him nice and hard and then sliding his lips up and then back down, up then down, up then much further down and swallowing.

Neji digs fingers into blond hair and bites back an aroused cry that slips through his teeth regardless. _Nnffggghnnhhhf_! Oh yes–this is so much better than having to listen to another word of that ridiculous song. He should have thought of this seven blocks earlier.

Naruto is ever enthusiastic despite the alcohol and all too soon Neji’s hips buck and he comes, eyes shut tight and his throat releasing a single, tawdry moan that extends through his last panting breaths as Naruto’s clever tongue licks him clean.

While Neji quickly fixes his pants–and wonders how to live through the embarrassment of losing his cool so thoroughly–Naruto stands up, leans in and talk-whispers right against his cheek.

“Next I’m gonna make you sing–with _this_.” Naruto takes Neji’s hand and rubs it against the bulge in his pants. Then he grins, nuzzling Neji’s neck.

It’s so ridiculous Neji bonks him. Naruto is too drunk to dodge, but not too drunk to lean in closer and lick the spot below his ear.

“But you’re gonna have to get me home first, ’cause I don’t want anyone else to hear your sexy voice when I put my tongue in your–”

“Alright! Let’s go!”

Neji grabs Naruto’s hand and leads them back to the street. Then he wraps one of Naruto’s arms behind his neck and they match their steps better than before now that they’re unified under the same goal of getting home as soon as possible.

Neji does some fast thinking just in case Naruto’s attention span is short enough that he’ll start yodeling again at any moment, and promises that: “If we get there in complete and utter silence you can make me sing all night.”

Naruto doesn’t make a peep, but Neji can tell he’s grinning the whole way and he flushes, already regretting his choice of distractions. Well, it won’t be so bad to let him do what he wants; Neji _did_ shove him into an alleyway and demand a blowjob, after all, which isn’t a normal thing for _him_ to do no matter what the circumstances. He can admit to feeling some guilt over the matter, and Naruto is probably too drunk for sex anyhow.

However.

Anyone who asks Neji the next day why he’s walking so stiffly, or how he lost his voice, or why Naruto looks so sparkly and energetic gets their entire chakra network sealed.

—

Ω

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! :) 
> 
> Find me on twitter: @erisabesu3


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